Tuesday, August 29, 2023

Live (Any way you want) and Like it!


"It is the lady who expects orchids who gets them."- Marjorie Hillis

In Live Alone and Like it, Marjorie Hillis offers more insight in how to create the life of your dreams for the average struggling woman today, single or taken, than many how-to guides I've seen in the last twenty years. A clarion call when it was first published in 1936, this "classic guide for the single woman" rings true for how to win at life now as much as then. She is not here to wish pity on the unmarried, or lately unemployed, but to encourage with a slight tap of the ruler, to pull yourself up by your silk stockings and show a little leg already!

She wades you in slowly, "The beginning is your attitude-- your approach so to speak. For the basis [of successful living] is determination to make it successful."

Later she emphasizes, "This business of making your own life may sound dreary--especially if you have a dated mind and still think of yourself as belonging to the Weaker Sex. But it isn't really. You can have a grand time doing it."

In terms of creating your life, the best version of your life, she insists: "The idea is to do it yourself--and to do it first. But to do it well, you'll need at least two things: a mental picture of yourself as a gay and independent person, and spunk enough to get the picture across to the other person." 

Such exemplary take away quotes include: 

"Be a Communist, a stamp collector, or a Ladies Aid worker if you must, but for heaven's sake, be something. When you are something, do something about it. Pick out your logical prey, and pounce" (39).

 Later, "Are you really entertained? Anyone with any gumption can be. The first rule is to have several passionate interests" (53). 

She gives an array of possible interests to be involved in, including antiquing, astrology, tap dancing, genealogy or making jewelry. "Divide your time intelligently into hours spent alone and hours spent in entertainment. Both should be taken in moderation, and balanced rations are best" (56). 

Also, she suggests planning the week beforehand, "instead of drifting along, thinking something pleasant will show up." Good advice for us all. And in case you didn't realize it yet, "the full schedule involves a certain number of friends" (57). I concur 100%.

In terms of my personal favorite, that I can attest to, is the importance of Travel in one's busy, ordinary life. "A reasonable amount of travel ought, of course, to be listed among the necessities. (An unreasonable amount if you can manage it.")

Marjorie Hillis has many more insights for those interested souls looking to craft their life on their own terms. Read it if you're ready! (Amazon has it where most bookstores will not!)

It is true that you have to make your life fit your income. But..."with a reasonable amount of ingenuity, you can have a marvelous time on practically nothing" (60).

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